Withersin’s Damned Interview with:

 

Shane Gersley (aka: Cellblock)

I am a nomadic giant mushroom spore sent to observe and ridicule.  You all humor me.

 

List published works:

Most of my works were burned when the Moors sacked the Alexandria library.

 

List website: www.myspace.com/shanegersley

 

How can we contact you?

Call out to me the next time you have a nightmare about pygmies.

 

 

In your own words, define Withersin.

n. The philosophical concept that all stories and ideas genesis from one idea and source, and therefore must all end up into one thought closing the circle (as a side note, there was a brief period in 1347 when Trappist monks, drunk on their own beer believed this concept would be heralded in the end by the sound of 10,000,000 fish blinking).

 

If you were a sideshow act, what would you be?

A Bedpan reader, you piss away your future.

 

What is your greatest non-literary influence?

Oil of Olay

 

Describe your most irrational fear.

Apricots are my bane.

 

How about your most guilty pleasure?

I really like beer.

 

Name the most disturbing nursery rhyme/fairy tale you can recall.

The nativity.

 

Do you eat meat?

As the great author Maddox writes “Vegetarians, for every animal you don’t eat, I will eat three.”

 

What were the skies like when you were young?

Like peoples eyes, only more intelligent.

 

Name your favorite garden tool.

The Garden Weasel, that son-of-a-bitch really wrecks everything from weeds to drywall.

 

Name your least favorite color, first job and worst job.

Invisible, digging, machinist.

 

Favorite:  Author, Movie, Music Group, Song, and Quote.

Lovecraft, Conan, Misfits, “I looked into their evil eyes and they crouched like cravens, I showed them my sword, and they trembled and louted low. I gave their bones for food to the rats and ravens, and I pray the god for another and FIERCER foe.”  From the DWELLER IN THE TEMPLE by Manly Wade Wellman.

 

If you were a loaf of bread what kind would you be?

Peanut Spiderweb

 

Weirdest news you have read in your local newspaper:

Something about bums.

 

Why horror?  Umm, Misty is my wife. That can be horrific!

 

Here's a photo. (seen on Interview main page)

“INEDIBLE NOT INTENDED FOR HUMAN FOOD”

You have 112 words. Go.

To those who are adversely affected by this sign, I am truly sorry for the inconvenience.  The authorities caught me eating out of various big rigs along the highway and thought it prudent to attach warnings to those of my ilk.  I have suggested to the Department of Transportation on many occasions not to transport large quantities of human gall bladder in such shiny chariots.  Obviously I have been ignored and now have become a victim of some ghoulish prejudice. I call to thee all denizens of the dark, rally, gather beneath my banner and rise.  It is time my brethren.  Rise, take back what is rightfully ours, and destroy your masters.

 

 

 

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